I would like to explain a pure phenomenon to you, that is called “The Law of non resistance”.

Let me explain the phenomena in brief:

If you kick in a tree, it will hurt really badly.
If somebody throws a medicine ball to you, and you did not catch it, it will hit you, and it will hurt really badly.
If you do not relax your nerves during the day of work, you will have headache, and it could hurt really badly.
If someone is attractive to you, but you fear, that he or she won't like you, and you miss the ask for a date, yes at the end, it will hurt badly.

Things changes constantly in our life. Nothing happens as we imagined, even if we well plan a date, and it is successful, I am 100% sure, that it does not happened as planned previously.

Take some time to think through where we fail in most cases, and reveal the acknowledgements:

Relax your mind and body

Before you start to anything, never forget to be relaxed, even if it is difficult. Start breathing calmly, and be prepared for everything that comes to you. I know it is contradiction, “How I could be prepared for everything?”, now that is why you should be relaxed. In sports that is why big sportsman try to relax every time, they are not in play. The key to success is, that you should be in a state of relaxation, it starts in your mind, and it will effect your body. If you are relaxed you will harder to get tired. The least resistance in your muscle, the least pain will emerge.

dodgeballDo you remember the game dodgeball in your childhood? Life works exactly as dodgeball, there are four ways to act:

  1. The ball strikes you, because you did not have the good reaction
  2. You avoid the hit, just by step away from the path of the ball
  3. You try to catch the ball, but it falls out from your hands
  4. You catch the ball, because your hands absorbs the energy of the throw

The most successful players are able to catch the ball. They understand, that they should not stand tensely, rather being relaxed and act according to the situation.

In his book Dan Millman explains the above with his character Socrates, who learned to fight from his teacher Serafin:
“Please, Serafim, I don’t need you to constantly remind me to relax and breathe. I understand your point!”
“Doing is understanding” – Serafim said.
“In combat, there’s no time to think. Beforehand, you may plan and strategize, but all plans are tentative and must change on the spur of the moment. Whatever happens, there’s only one certainty: It will not go exactly as you expect. So expect nothing, but be prepared for anything. Relax and trust your body’s wisdom. It will respond on it’s own.”

A little bit fear could be helpful

Think about fear as a tool, it reminds us that something particular will happen. But it is not more than an alarm clock. We should use as a tool, and we should not let to dominate our thoughts. If the next step seems to be very scary, but your sense tells you, that it is the right thing, never listen to the fear, because it is temporary, it will pass away.

Open your mind

Focusing means “Being in the present” to me, but never focus on particular things, because if you immersed in that thing, you will lose the opportunities that are outside your focus. Some years ago, I saw a TED presentation called The puzzle of motivation.

In the presentation Dan Pink explained “the candle problem”, where a complex task should be solved by the participants. The outcome was, that if somebody has a direct reward (money), their focus narrowed, so they were not able to solve the problem. For narrowed focus people are hard to step out from the circle, they are not open minded.

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The “How” is as important as the outcome

“The true warrior, retains his humanity even in battle. In winning a brutal victory, you may still lose your soul. Those who fight the dragon may become the dragon.”

Never forget about your values, winning is not everything. You should only prove to yourself, not for others.

“In truth, you have no opponents but yourself. Make peace within, and there will be no one who can overcome you. And no one you will wish to overcome.”